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Greg Schwem

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Comedian, Humor Columnist, Author
Greg Schwem’s comedic take on the 21st century workplace and work/life balance has landed him on SIRIUS Radio, FOX News, Comedy Central and the pages of Parents Magazine. More than just a business humorist, Greg is also an author, nationally syndicated humor columnist, award-winning greeting card writer and creator of funnydadinc, voted one of the top Dad humor sites of 2016.  His recent business travels have resulted in a hilarious web series, A Comedian Walks Into an Airbnb.

Fee Range: $10,001 – $20,000
Location:
Illinois
Phone: 800-328-6008

A graduate of Northwestern University’s prestigious Medill School of Journalism, Greg never envisioned a career in laughter. Instead, he settled in Florida, becoming an award-winning reporter for NBC-owned WPTV in West Palm Beach. But the comedy bug bit Greg hard and he returned to his hometown of Chicago, where he honed his standup act in nightclubs. When he began inserting material about business and technology into his act, audience members approached him and said, “You really should come down to my office and tell those jokes.” Behold! A new approach to comedy was born.

Greg’s two keynotes – “Work, Laugh, Repeat” and “Rock, Roll & Laugh Your Way to the Top” – provide hilarious looks at today’s corporate environment and the latest tools used to conduct business. Indeed, Greg’s client list includes such corporate heavyweights as McDonald’s, Microsoft, General Motors, IBM, Hyatt Hotels, United Airlines and Cisco Systems. What sets Greg apart from other corporate entertainers is his ability—and willingness—to customize material for his audience while working within the parameters of the corporate environment. That means no profanity or politically incorrect material. “That’s never been a part of my show anyway,” Greg recently told a reporter.

When Greg hits the stage he already has perused the company’s Internet site, combed the internal message boards and even sifted through numerous PowerPoint presentations. “There is no such thing as too much information,” Greg says. “I know corporate audiences like to laugh at themselves so the more ammunition I get, the funnier it will be. Just don’t give me a 10-K report. There is NOTHING funny about that.”

Greg’s preparation always includes a conference call with company executives and, in some cases, an onsite visit.

Customized Material from Past Shows

John Hancock: You sell the U.S. Global Leader Growth Fund.  Is there a U.S. Regional Follower Growth Fund as well?

Michigan Realtors Assoc.:  Your organization has been around since 1915?  What kind of sessions did realtors attend at the 1915 convention?  “The do’s and don’t’s of selling that log cabin!”

Campbell’s Soup:   You make “premium organic” baby food?  Don’t you realize that, after the baby eats your incredibly healthy food, he’s gonna grab a fistful of the cat’s hair and eat that too?

Besides customized material, Greg entertains audiences with stories about tedious business meetings, SmartPhone addiction, “frequently” asked questions and his fascination with the American Girl Doll company. In addition to his hefty speaking schedule, Greg writes a weekly humor column nationally distributed by Tribune Content Agency. He also is the author of Text Me If You’re Breathing: Observations, Frustrations and Life Lessons From a Low-Tech Dad and The Road to Success Goes Through the Salad Bar:  A Pile of BS (Business Stories) From a Corporate Comedian.

Speech Titles and Descriptions:

VIRTUAL PROGRAM
You Can't Quarantine Laughter
A 45-minute, customized presentation conducted over Zoom or a similar conferencing app. Greg Schwem will lead the webinar, opening with a brief video that shows some of the country’s best known stars from the comedy and music worlds who have overcome adversity to become the leaders in their respective fields. Speakers should be cranked up LOUD for this!

From there, Greg appears on camera and, through a series of comedic monologues and PowerPoint slides, shows participants that there is light at the end of the tunnel. The audience will see numerous examples of how companies used humor to create successful campaigns and turn their businesses around. He will show how companies have incorporated the coronavirus into their campaigns. Don’t believe that’s possible? Then you haven’t heard of the suburban Chicago restaurant offering a free roll of toilet paper with every takeout order! Through live chat and polling features, Greg will encourage audience interaction and will virtually discuss ways to incorporate humor into your group’s messaging and daily office routines. Hey, Greg is even okay with a little “virtual heckling.” Keep it clean, please!

WHAT YOU WON’T GET: Political statements and opinions. We’ve heard enough of those.

Work, Laugh, Repeat
Perfect for any group that needs a humorous break from the serious side of business. In spite of its therapeutic qualities, laughter is often absent from the business environment. Greg shows it is possible to laugh at work and about work. Audience members will put down their iPads and Blackberries and laugh along with Greg as he good-naturedly discusses topics such as Smart Phone abuse, social network overload, never-ending conference calls, “frequently” asked questions, and home office workers. His preparation includes company web site research, phone conferences and maybe even a personal visit!

Rock, Roll and Laugh Your Way to the Top
Greg Schwem knows a thing or two about rock and roll. As a comedian who has opened concerts for stars ranging from Keith Urban, to Celine Dion, to Enrique Iglesias to (wait for it) KC And the Sunshine Band, Greg has seen how rock and roll is really a business. Like your business. In short? Every company and employee has “rock star” potential. Greg shows you how to achieve that potential in a presentation that combines hilarious comedy, live concert footage and a musical soundtrack featuring everything from classic rock to country to techno. Topics include “Why Every Office Needs a Keith Richards,” “Are you Team Taylor or Team Kanye?,” and “Don’t Let Your Company Become a Country Song.” Rock on!

Meeting Emcee/Video Host
A good emcee needs to multitask. He must keep the event moving, be adept at improvisation and work efficiently with all participants onstage. Greg Schwem has hosted everything from a one-hour awards ceremony for 200 BAE Systems engineers to a three-day conference for 6,000 McDonald’s restaurant managers, to a virtual webinar for IBM customers. He is equally at ease chatting with a company CEO live on stage, pronouncing (correctly) the names of awards recipients, or conducting humorous on-camera interviews with meeting attendees.

Comedy With a Byte
Just want some entertainment during the day or evening? Greg has over 20 years experience as a stand-up comedian and can turn your meeting space into a comedy club with a routine that combines company information with hilarious real life stories, audience interaction and technology.

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